Monday Melee de la Diva - 6/18/07

1. The Misanthtropic: Name something (about humanity) you absolutely hate.

I hate that there are some people in this life that take everything that happens to them seriously. I guess you’d call them drama queens/kings. These are the people that must have everything revolve around them. These are the people who keep the shit stirred. And if they don’t have their own shit stirring, they go and stir some for someone else… just to keep something going at all times.
People like this need to be bitch-slapped. Real problems are drama. Not the fact that your lay of the day, whom you’ve found on an internet dating site, is seeing no less than 4 other people at the same time as you. This is not drama. This is poor judgement.
Real life drama is loosing a child. Real life drama is wondering how you’re gonna pay the rent. Real life drama is your car breaking down and having no money to fix it.

2. The Meretricious: Expose something or someone that’s phony, fraudulent or bogus.

Paris Hilton. I know it seems like I’m obsessing over her lately. Maybe I am because I’m bored and have no real life of my own. Regardless of that, the skank is totally a fake. Just because she’s locked up in a cage, she’s claiming to have found Jesus. She told Babs Walters that she’s been reading the Bible and other and a sorted variety of other religion-inspired books.
First, I’m not so sure that after only 4 days in jail that the girl had time to read AND ABSORB enough information out of the inspired books. Look, it takes biblical scholars years and years of reading and studying to make heads and/or tails of the Bible. And she wants to convince all of us common folk that she’s really getting into it and learning something.
B- Anybody who watches E! News (or Fox or CNN for that matter) has heard about the humongus “Paris is getting out of jail” bash that’s being planned. Do you think that she’s gonna read enough about Jesus and righteous living that she’s not gonna turn up a bottle and get ripped? Me either.

3. The Malcontent: Name something you’re unhappy with.

I’m extremely unhappy that I went outside on a scorching hot Sunday afternoon to wash my car. I did a bang up job too. I even cleaned the wheels with that crap that can eat the skin off of your hands. It looked super great!
I went in the house to get a glass of ice water. When I came back outside 10 minutes later a bird had already shit on the trunk.

4. The Meritorious: Give someone credit for something and name it if you can.

I give my kids credit today. After all that he put them through while they were growing up, they still try to treat their dad with some sort of love and respect.

5. The Mirror: See something good about yourself and name it.

I am coming out of “sloth” mode and getting motivated to do something and be somebody again. Which actually feels really, really good.

6. The Make-Believe: Name something you wish for.

I think I’ll wish for sex this week. Sex and days off from work. Sex, days off from work and a new car. Sex, days off from work, a new car and to win the lottery.
Sex, days off from work, a new car, to win the lottery, and lots of beer. Yah, that would make today alot of fun. Sex, on my extra day off, in my new car that I got with my winnings from the lottery which was sponsered by a beer company.
Yah, that’s it.