Legal Cannibalism?

I was listening to WATE news this morning while I was getting ready to go to work. I just about poked my eye out with my mascara wand when I heard them say that the vote was 18 - 12 on the bill that Tim Burchett has sponsored which would allow any adult (over 21) driver of a motorcycle could ride legally without a helmet.

Well, now there's a really good idea. I'm really a simple minded girl. But, the possible outcome of letting a bunch of YA-hoo's run rampant on the roads with nothing there to protect what brains God gave them doesn't sound all to smart.

Scenario: Let's jump onto a land missile, gun it up to 125mph, dart in and out of traffic, and hope with all that's good, that we don't get into an accident wherein we fly off of the motorcyle, sail 100 feet through the air, land on or whack our head and spill our brain out all over the road for everybody that passes by to see.

Burchett, who is a Rep. senator from Knoxvegas, was catapulted to fame with his "We should have the right to scoop up that possum from the side of the road and eat it" bill of 1999.

So, within this rant I wish to pose two questions:

1. If a dork on a crotch rocket decides to fore go the helmet, gets in a horrific crash and subsequently dies, wouldn't that, in theory, be considered natural selection?
Think about it, if a body is stupid enough to rip and roar down the freeway without some sort of protection on said head, isn't it a matter of natural selection. The stupid ones go to make way for the more intellectually superior?
Not to imply that I think someone who rides with no helmet should go die, not at all. I'm just saying USE YOUR HEAD PEOPLE.

2. The second question that came to mind when considering this bill, along with the ding-dong that supported it is this: If we in the Great State of Tennessee are legally allowed to chow down on some tasty raccoon, possum, deer or whatever else may fly out in front of us, does that mean cannibalism of the dork-non-helmet-type- motorcycle rider is legal?

I don't eat meat, so I gain nothing from this theory. Just having a little fun.

So, I'm A Catty Bitch ~ Sue me

First, I have to say love is grand. Love is the greatest feeling in the world, especially if it is true love and the other person is the one you intend to spend your forever with. I will preach that day and night. I am indeed in love with the man I intend to spend forever with and I cherish him very much.

However, in a relationship (and my fiancee agrees) two people can still maintain relationships and friendships that were in place prior to the meeting of said significant other. Individual identity is what attracted you to that other person and that other person to you to begin with.

What is the point here? Well, the point is that just because I have found someone that I love, cherish and want to spend forever with, doesn't mean I wish to cut the friends I had in my life before him out of it.
If nothing else, I wish for us to remain close. Yes, there will be less time out for me. No, I won't attend every Wednesday night gathering. But IT IS NOT because my man doesn't encourage it and IT IS NOT because I love my friends any less.

It is simply because I have a teenage daughter who really needs me to be home. It is because I sometimes get to steal a weekday with my fella and his kids.

Just because I'm not there all the time doesn't mean that I don't want to hear the stories about who did what, or in our case, see the photographic evidence.
Just because I'm not always there, doesn't mean that I am turning my back on my friends. Just because I'm not always there doesn't mean that any one of them can't call me in the middle of the night to cry on my shoulder if they need to.

I am dedicated to spending my forever with HIM. I am very much in love. But my friends were the ones who cried with me when I was sad. They laughed with me when I was tickled about something. They are there through thick and thin. I love them and I will always want to hear the sappy dating drama (tales) and I won't just be smiling a fake fucking smile and shaking my nappy fucking head acting like I care. I will be listening intently, most likely holding my gut from laughing so hard and truly caring about what words are passing from my friends' mouth to my ears.

Ok, now specifically to you, the one who pretended to be our friends. Who the hell do you think you are? Seriously? Do you think you're high, mighty and perfect?
These girls all befriended you when you had nothing but extra belly fat.
No, girl, see this one loud and clear.... YOU ARE NOTHING LIKE ANY OF US.
At least I've heard that's what you said....
YOU ARE EXACTLY RIGHT!!!!!!

1. Friends don't molest someone else's man. There were plenty of occassions that you blatently stuck your tongue down the throat of a taken man. Granted, Ron was not mine... but the other man in question was a claimed man. You had no respect for boundaries and no respect for your girlfriends.
WHICH SHOWS YOU ARE NOTHING LIKE ANY OF US because there is not a single one of us who would look twice let alone deep throat one of the other girl's boyfriend.
Just not kosher... not acceptable....

2. Friends don't just quit talking to friends. If nothing else, when a happy event such as an impending wedding or pregnancy is on deck, I would think a girl would want her friends close by.
WHICH SHOWS YOU ARE NOTHING LIKE ANY OF US because I would be honored for all of my friends and family to be there when I say I do.

Either you didn't want us getting close to your man because you know that paybacks are a bitch... or you were horrified that if you let him speak to us, that he would find out about your legendary exploits on the skank side.

Hmmmm..... go figure.Everybody pulls a drunk now and then... get over it. Hey Dorothy.......

Elevator madness

Annoying Things To Do On An Elevator?

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.
23)bring a whoopie cushion and use it when people are there

At the right time

First and foremost I have to say that we have all had our emotional trials and tribulations in the past year. Some way more serious and real than others, but none the less we've all rode that rollercoaster together.

Of course, all referring the pirates that have stuck together. You said that you felt empty and that you were a runner. Hello baby... we've all been there. Fact is, that not a single one of us can say we haven't shut out the important people in our lives and dwelled within our own self trying to find out what the hell is going on in our own little pirate heads. I will step up to the plate and admit that Diva did her fair share of melting down on occasion (wink wink) during 2006. Yes, we all had rumblings of dismay with each other here and there. Yes, we all kind of butted heads and we all kicked sand at the umpires.

BUT THE TOTALLY AWESOME THING IS:
THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR!!
We can argue. We can say things that might be bitchy or sarcastic (again, I've said my fair share of things that were totally bitchy since last February)... we can stray from our friends and withdraw. And sometimes all our TRUE friends can do is take a step back and let us deal with our demons, and eventually get over whatever it is that's bringing us down only to find our friends standing there, with open arms waiting to grab us back and tell us how much they love us now just like they always have... I, like you, am a proud yet humble and grateful recipient of that love. Back in the spring of 2006, when I first met you and Becky, I was hurting and alone and in such desperate need of TRUE FRIENDS that would love me, grow with me, kick me in the ass when I need it. And that is what I found when I found all y'all.

You know, when me and Tony found one another I was so thankful that it wasn't one minute sooner. I wasn't ready. I've come to realize, God blesses us with what we need... not when we want and ask for it, but when HE feels that our life is ready to share with another. Think back, if I had met Tony six months ago, do you really think I had it in me to nurture an infant relationship into love? We all know the answer to that one don't we.... Absolutely NO. I, like you, and Becky, and Robyn, was blessed with someone special when my life was in order to be shared.

Cheers to you, baby! For your ability to recognize, and conquer, your demons. Glad to have you back and estatic to see you happy.

Love ya!
The Diva

24-Bar Break - Farewell my friend

Girl, I think we are all so numb right now that this really happened. Your smile, you laugh, your 24 bar breaks, your 1/2 sweet 1/2 unsweet tea, your friendship...
You know though, I wouldn't have taken one cent for the year I have been able to say that you are my friend. Every smile, every hug, every time I ran from your camera. Girl we all made some awesome memories together. I've said it before and I'll say it again. We all found each other when we all needed something. God gave us each other and though you're gone, you're really still here with each one of us.
I LOVE YOU, SUSAN.

So many surveys, so little time *jeez*

We get these surveys and we all put in canned one liner answers. And honestly, how many times do you have to answer the same question about what color your underwear are or how many times in the last 3 weeks someone else has slept in your bed?
No, I'm not on a high horse. I am one of the most guilty individuals that I know. If I am bored at work or have nothing to do and there is a survey sitting there in the bulletins, it's like a train wreck. I have to look. And then, before I know it, I am committing a crime against all that is right in the world and tap, tap, tapping my keyboard, filling in the answers.

A Little Sad

In general I try to be a believer that most people are telling the truth about the little things. I mean, what would one have to gain by telling stupid little white lies about little things that really don't matter in the grand scheme of things... until they are lied about. Then they become a problem.

In my simple little mind, if one will lie about the smallest of frivolous things, what would make me think that the same one wouldn't lie about something big?
Is this any way to find trust? I honestly think not.

If you don't want to do something, don't do it. But when you are asked if you are doing it, and you aren't doing it... be honest and say, "Well, I decided not to and that's why I'm doing this instead".

It is as simple as that. Resolved in one simple sentence. Now I am sitting here wondering if little things are falsehoods often